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Nightlight: A Parody

by The Harvard Lampoon

2020-12-28 19:42:45

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About three things I was absolutely certain. First, Edwart was most likely my soul mate, maybe. Second, there was a vampire part of him–which I assumed was wildly out of his control–that wanted me dead. And third, I unconditionally, ir... Read more
About three things I was absolutely certain. First, Edwart was most likely my soul mate, maybe. Second, there was a vampire part of him–which I assumed was wildly out of his control–that wanted me dead. And third, I unconditionally, irrevocably, impenetrably, heterogeneously, gynecologically, and disreputably wished he had kissed me.

And thus Belle Goose falls in love with the mysterious and sparkly Edwart Mullen in the Harvard Lampoon’s hilarious send-up of Twilight.

Pale and klutzy, Belle arrives in Switchblade, Oregon looking for adventure, or at least an undead classmate. She soon discovers Edwart, a super-hot computer nerd with zero interest in girls. After witnessing a number of strange events–Edwart leaves his tater tots untouched at lunch! Edwart saves her from a flying snowball!–Belle has a dramatic revelation: Edwart is a vampire. But how can she convince Edwart to bite her and transform her into his eternal bride, especially when he seems to find girls so repulsive?

Complete with romance, danger, insufficient parental guardianship, creepy stalker-like behavior, and a vampire prom, Nightlight is the uproarious tale of a vampire-obsessed girl, looking for love in all the wrong places. Less

Book Details

File size7.92 X 5.2 X 0.51 in
Print pages160
PublisherKnopf Doubleday Publishing Group
Publication date November 3, 2009
LanguageEnglish
ISBN9780307476104
autor-image
The Harvard Lampoon
Author
The Harvard Lampoon is the world's oldest continuously published humor magazine. Many of its alums go on to be famous and successful-including Conan O'Brien, Kurt Andersen, Colin Jost, Lawrence O'Donn...

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